Simon Crisp: October 2012 Archives


With Halloween fast approaching there are going to be plenty of people claiming to have a great Halloween scare trick… they wont be as good as magician Rich Ferguson.


Ferguson has scored an internet hit with a video of him performing a head drop trick on the streets of his home town San Luis Obispo.

Click play and enjoy… just try not to lose your head.

275x250.jpg Because every man wishes he was James Bond, a paintball website is allowing them to run around dressed as their hero while shooting down infamous Bond villains… but using a paintball gun rather than a Walther PPK.

The Skyfall Paintball package, which has been launched to celebrate the new 007 movie, gives paintball players the opportunity to re-enact some of the cult hero’s most iconic scenes, all while wearing a tuxedo.

Villains will be played by the site’s staff and participants are being warned to keep tuxedo spending to a minimum as it's unlikely they'll be able to get the paint out of the clothes should they get shot.

However, paintball spies won't look quite as smooth as Daniel Craig, due to safety regulations they will still have to wear unstylish safety goggles.

275x250.jpg A mobile phone insurance website has uncovered its top 10 weirdest insurance claims of the past 12 months… including a farmer whose mobile ended up inside a cow.

Whilst many people break their phones by dropping the handset and smashing the screen, data released by MobileInsurance.co.uk has revealed the top ten weirdest mobile insurance claims.
 
1. A farmer in Devon claimed his phone had disappeared inside the back end of one of his cows when he’d been using the torch on his iPhone whilst assisting the cow during calving. The phone later made an appearance, but was damaged.

2. A lady in her early 40s from Nottingham claimed that she’d baked her Nokia 6303i into a Victoria Sponge she’d been making for her daughter’s birthday. It didn’t endure the heat of gas mark 5.


A family in Albuquerque have been left puzzled after a stranger repeatedly climbed onto their porch in the early morning … to rearrange their patio furniture.


CCTV footage shows the unknown woman walking past the home, noticing that the family have rejected her new layout and put the furniture back, and then doing it again.

The Dentandts from New Mexico said: "It's been funny but it's kind of creepy to know that someone is coming on our property."

275x250.jpg Architects have created an interesting design for a possible new bridge in Paris … it consists of three inflatable doughnut trampolines.

The bizarre design was created as a response to an ideas competition for a new bridge in Pari - which will add to the 37 bridges which already cross the Seine.

A spokesperson for design firm Atelier Zündel Cristea said: "It appears to us that Paris has the bridges and passages necessary for the flow of vehicular and pedestrian traffic across its waterways.

"Our intention is to invite its visitors and inhabitants to engage on a newer and more playful path across this same water. We propose, now, a distinctive urban feature: an inflatable bridge equipped with giant trampolines, dedicated to the joyful release from gravity as one bounces above the river.


In a bid to promote their new monitors, LG decided to scare office workers by fitting the displays to the floor of an elevator and making it look like it was collapsing.

A video which has gone viral online shows the response of unwitting elevator-travelers as the panels of the floor beneath their feet, appear to fall down the lift shaft.

As you would imagine there is much gasping, jumping and looks of horror before people realise they are not really going to die.

Or that's what the video claims to show, but many people claim the video is faked and the people in the lift are actors - pointing to reflected green-screens and other apparent filming blunders.

Ceefax service to close after 38 years

275x250.jpg Ceefax, the BBC's teletext service, has closed after bringing news-fans pixelated headlines for 38 years.

The world's first teletext service, Ceefax was initially seen as a way of providing subtitles for the deaf, but was soon used to provide news, sport, weather and quizzes.

The demise has come about because of the digital switchover. Over the past couple of years Ceefax has disappeared from most UK homes and now viewers in Northern Ireland will lose their analogue signal, and Ceefax with it.

No amount of pushing the red button will be the same as dialing in the number for the page of news you wanted.


Unsuspecting rail travelers at Antwerp Central station in Belgium were recently challenged to spend a minute as James Bond in a bid to win exclusive tickets for the movie SKYFALL.


After using a Coke Zero machine in the station, travelers were asked via a touchscreen if they wanted to win exclusive tickets to SKYFALL.

Once they had entered their name they were then told they had 70 seconds to get to platform 6. It shouldn't have been too difficult, but organisers had made it harder by introducing obstacles which needed navigating.

As the Bond theme was plays the would-be Bonds had to make their way past men carrying sheets of glass, fruit-stalls falling over, joggers, dogs, and an attractive woman who wanted to stop them

275x250.jpg A study by leading British body language expert, Robert Phipps has revealed the position we sleep in reflects our mood, stress level and even personality.

The research, which was carried out for budget hotel chain Premier Inn, found the most common way of sleeping, The Foetal position (58%), reflects subconsciously trying to de-stress in our sleep.
 
The Log, the second most common sleeping position (28%) sees people sleep with their arms and legs by their side, with the report stating that such a rigid position can lead to individuals being very stubborn and set in their ways.
 
Despite, over half of the nation sleeping in a way that shows they are stressed, a quarter say they sleep on their side with their arms stretched out, dubbed The Yearner, meaning they're constantly on the hunt for new challenges to try and reach for their dreams.
 
Not only are our sleeping positions revealing we are stressed, but also that we are anxious and feeling out of control, with 17% saying they sleep on their front with their arms above their head in The Freefaller.


Have you ever wondered what it would be like to jump into a frozen swimming pool? Well this man did… and something tells us he won't be doing it again.


Wearing his swimming trunk despite the chilly weather the would-be stuntman pull a series of poses worthy of Usian Bolt before dive-bombing on the ice.

But despite his best efforts, the man failed to break the ice and landed with a big thump before painfully sliding across the pool.

275x250.jpg Research has found that David and Joanne are the unluckiest names in the UK and that people with those monikers are most likely to suffer personal injury.

So according to case data released by a UK-based firm of personal injury solicitors anyone named David or Joanne should take extra care when leaving the house in the morning.

The data, released by the team at Edwards Hoyle, aimed to discover trends amongst personal injury claims, and looked into the most common names, ages and occupations of personal injury claimants they’ve dealt with over the past two years.

A spokesperson for Edwards Hoyle said: "We thought we’d take a look at who is most likely to claim based on names and years of birth. David and Joanne topped our charts as the most likely names to suffer some form of personal injury."

And it's extra bad news if you are a Fishermen called David … that's the unluckiest profession.


A video of a pair of twins falling asleep in their plates of spaghetti has become an online hit … as well it should.

22-month-old brothers who are sitting in high-chairs at a restaurant initially try to keep their eyes open as then enjoy their spaghetti bolognese. But tiredness soon wins over and the pair bob up and down, getting the messy sauce all over their faces.

Writing on YouTube mother Johanne Stetka said: "After a long morning of playing in the pool and building sand castles on the beach my twins could not stay awake to finish their lunch.

They were trying really hard and were really enjoying their food as you can see. Sleep v.s. tasty spaghetti.. sleep won! 

275x250.jpg An abandoned kitten and puppy at Battersea Dogs & Cats Home have dispelled the age old saying ‘fighting like dogs and cats’ by becoming best friends.

At just weeks old, Buttons the dog and Kitty the cat were both abandoned. Now they are now being hand-reared together at the animal home and have become very close.

In fact the inseparable pair are so close they sleep together, play together and even feed together.

Battersea Veterinary Nurse Sascha Taylor. She says: "Normally we’d hand rear puppies and kittens separately but we thought we could try putting them together as they are both so young.

275x250.jpg Ever wondered how cooking a squirrel for dinner could end up worse than it sounds? How about setting fire to your apartment block and causing a massive fire!

That's what happened in Michigan recently when a man was preparing his squirrel meal by removing the animal’s fur using a propane torch.

As a result of the blaze, which started on the third floor, twenty people were evacuated from the building as flames spread to the roof.

It's not known whether the man had enjoyed flame-grilled squirrel before, but the chances are he won't be trying that particular delicacy again any time soon.

275x250.jpg A German drinks firm has launched a range of spirits which has been poured over the breasts of a naked model prior to bottling. Really!

G-Spirits sells bottles of rum, whisky and vodka which has been poured over the boobs of voluptuous models before being collected in a special glass basin.

It's claimed the odd process adds to the flavour of the drinks, though the firm are keen to stress they conform to food and hygiene requirements. Medical personnel are also present to verify everything is in order.

A spokesperson for G-Spirits said: "To create the perfect taste we let every single drop of our spirits run over the breasts of a special woman, one whose characteristics we saw reflected in the liquor.


Over the weekend Felix Baumgartner became the first person to jump from the edge of space when he stepped out of his capsule which had been carried by a giant helium balloon to over 128,000 feet (24 miles) above Roswell, New Mexico.


But of more interest to us at Newslite Towers is the fact the record-breaking jump has been recreated with LEGO, we're a bit like that!

The 1 minute 44 second video is said to recreate the amazing achievement at 1/350th the size of the real thing and is complete with footage from the balloon and a bird's eye-view  of LEGO felix diving back to Earth.

The video was created to promote the Model Maker Fair which is taking place in Vienna from 25th to 28th of October.

275x250.jpg It looks like a cupcake which was recovered from the scene of a violent crime, and sure enough that's the idea behind the Dexter cupcake from Magnolia Bakery.

The bakers were commissioned by TV channel Showtime to create the cake to celebrate the airing of Season 7 of hit serial killer TV show Dexter.

The glass shard and blood red velvet cupcakes - which were served at a special event in Grand Central Terminal's Vanderbilt Hall - were covered in dyed red syrup to look like blood.

The glass shards are actually just sugar glass and wouldn't rip your mouth open on the first bite … but would you be brave enough to try them.

Unfortunately the gory cakes are not on general sale, which is a shame … because they could have made for a wonderfully traumatic birthday party for a six-year-old.

275x250.jpg If you want your plants to thrive talk to them in a Geordie accent – a leading expert has claimed.

Chris Bonnett, who has a four acre nursery in Essex and his own online garden centre, spent the summer researching which accents plants respond best to.

In his "ground breaking" horticultural experiment, Chris isolated groups of plants and his team spoke to them each day using different regional accents.

The plants were also played DVDs and CDs of regional soaps and pop stars to help reinforce the different dialects.

The results were impressive – with the Geordie plants growing almost 10% more than those in some other groups.


This man apparently got a little too close to two stags which were facing up to each other Bushy Park in London … and ended up having to climb a tree to escape them.


One of the testosterone-fuelled stags chased the man who tried hiding on the other side of the tree to the stag, before deciding the best idea was to climb out of its way.


When QVC presenter Cassie Slane fainted on live TV while talking about a new tablet computer, her colleague and co-host wasn't going to stop him making the sale, he carried on like nothing had happened.

So despite Slane pounding her chest and falling face-first onto the table while chatting about the FabTab Pro Tablet, Dan Hughes continued to talk about its features.

When the camera cut from the live footage to a product shot, you could almost hear the sound of Slane being dragged out of view before producers cut back to the studio.

Cassie Slane is said to now be fine and the collapse has been attributed to low blood sugar. Writing on Facebook she said: "Thanks to everyone for your kind words. I am feeling a lot better today!"

275x250.jpg Britain’s average busts have grown by three sizes in just two years, research has found, with the best selling bra size has going up from a 34B in 2010 to a 34DD in 2012.

Ladies living in the North, Midlands and Ireland are the ones contributing to this trend, whilst ladies in the South and Scotland have grown by a more modest two sizes.

And in Wales the average bra size is now a whopping E cup. But don't get too excited, experts say they can explain the uplifting news.

The increase is being attributed to women following role models such as Dita Von Teese, Kim Kardashian and Nigella Lawson and embrace their breasts.

An astonishing 78% of women surveyed by Debenhams - which conducted the study - admit to previously squeezing into a bra that was a smaller size than they should be wearing.

An elderly couple in Bedford received a visit from police after unwittingly growing a ginormous cannabis plant in their back garden.

Officers had been called to the house after the pot plant was spotted over a fence, growing in the back garden.

It turned out the pensioners had bought the plant as a small shrub from a car boot sale and carefully tended to it until it was the luxuriant specimen shown in this photo.

That's right, this being 2012 the police officers Tweeted a photo of the plant … but don't try to find it, it's already been seized by cops.

275x250.jpg Visitors to London’s famous Smithfields Meat Market may have got a shock recently, after spotting a butchers which appeared to be selling edible human limbs including hands and feet packaged like cuts of meat.

But Wesker & Son was actually the creation of food artist Sharon Baker who had been commissioned to help promote the launch of computer game Resident Evil 6 and no real human flesh was on sale.

To create the odd cuts, Sharon used Prosciutto and sausage meat to create the effect of internal flesh. For the terrine-based limbs, Sharon has created a delicious pate of chicken and pork mince mixed with cranberries and pistachio.

Sharon created a number of moulds using her own body – hands, feet and arms to form the limbs … which must make looking at this even weirder for her than it is for us.

275x250.jpg Meet HotTug, the world's first wood-fired hot tub boat. Yes it is just as odd, weird and wonderful as it sounds.

While the HotTug can be used as a typical boat for six to eight people, it's when it's filled with 2000 litres of water it becomes interesting.

That's because it then becomes a portable hottub - constructed from wood and fitted with glass fiber reinforced polyester - which can be enjoyed while cruising along canals or on a lake.

A wood stove in front of the boat heats the water in about 2.5 hours up to 38 degrees Celsius and an integrated electric motor allows people to cruise around for about 8 hours.

Crook steals iPhone from a baby (VIDEO)


CCTV footage has shown the moment a callous thief stole an iPhone from a 20-month-old baby, which had been given it to watch a cartoon.

Little Luella Reid had been handed the expensive phone to keep her quiet while out shopping in Ormskirk, Lancs and was watching Barney The Dinosaur.

But when the mothers back was turned, a man who had followed them into the store reached into the pram and grabbed the Apple iPhone.

Lancashire Police are now appealing for anyone who recognizes the man in the video to come forward.


275x250.jpg Research has discovered that looking at cute animals could actually help boost office productivity.

Japanese boffins conducted a study which required subjects to complete a hand-eye coordination task, 50% having been shown images of baby animals first, 50% having looked at adult animals.

Those who had looked at the cute baby animals consistently outperformed those who had looked at the adult animals. The experiment was then repeated with cute images again winning out.

A spokesperson said: "Results show that participants performed tasks requiring focused attention more carefully after viewing cute images

"This is interpreted as the result of a narrowed attentional focus induced by the cuteness-triggered positive emotion that is associated with approach motivation and the tendency toward systematic processing."

275x250.jpg We've previously told you about the wonderfully odd underwater sculptures by British artist Jason deCaires Taylor, well he's done it again with a series of underwater suburban homes.

But while they look like they are designed for you or us, theses homes are actually for various marine species … which is a good job because they are at the bottom of the sea at Cancun and Isla Mujeres National Marine Park.

Working with local marine biologists the units are designed with a variety of rooms, spaces, hideaways and textures all tailored for different reef inhabitants.

Located on an open stretch of terrain the houses also offer a place of shelter and refuge from reef predators such as Barracudas and Lion Fish.


A pair of dumb crooks who tried to rob a sofa store ended up red-faced after bungling their crime so badly it has been likened to a scene from Benny Hill.

The duo had brazenly loaded two sofas into a van at the Sofa King store in Northampton after pulling up at the back of the store.

But they forgot to close the doors of their getaway van and staff were able to unload the swag before the would-be crooks drove off.

CCTV footage shows the men speeding off empty-handed as the store manager stands with the two sofas he's just rescued. The crooks really were Sofa King stupid!

275x250.jpg Believe it or not this woman isn't pretending to make a phone call with her fingers, the gloves she is wearing have a fully functional Bluetooth earpiece built in.

The hi-Call has a speaker and a microphone sewed into thumb and pinkie, meaning wearers can speak on the phone, while being protected from the cold.
 
Makers say the Inspector Gadget-esque gloves have a battery which lasts for 10 days on standby and 20 hours call time.

They are compatible with all mobile phones with Bluetooth, but obviously you will look a little crazy talking into your hand as you walk down the road.

Oregon farmer eaten by his own pigs

275x250.jpg Authorities in Oregon are investigating how a 69-year-old farmer ended up getting eaten by his own hogs.

Terry Vance Garner had gone out to feed the animals on his farm near the Oregon coast but several hours later hadn't come back.

Another family member later found he had fed the animals, but not in the way he intended. His dentures and pieces of his body were discovered in the hog enclosure.

Authorities say the hogs had devoured most of the farmer by the time they arrived.

It's not known whether Garner had suffered a medical emergency before being eaten by the hogs, or whether they attacked him. One is thought to have bitten him previously.


What would you do if confronted by a giant black bear? If you're anything like us the answer probably involves much screaming and running, but not this woman … she shouted at him to go away.


A video showing exactly what happened when a bear paid a visit to Nishanto Grillo's home has been viewed by more than 500,000 people since being uploaded to YouTube.

In the footage the bear can be seen walking across the garden, before making it's way up some steps and onto the porch looking for food.

But rather than discover a tasty treat the bear was confronted by Nishanto  shouting: "Get down right now! No! No! No! Down." rather wisely he did

275x250.jpg A police officer has been left red-faced after launching an investigation into a "suspicious bright light" in the sky, which turned out to be the moon.

Detailed in the latest edition of Police magazine the gaffe happened when the office in question was one night duty in Worcestershire.

He contacted his sergeant he was going up into the Clent Hills to investigate a 'suspicious bright light' which was shining from the other side of the hills.

But 20 minutes later, rather than requesting the back-up he'd thought he might need, the PC contacted the station to let them know he'd found the source of the light … the moon.

275x250.jpg Turning one is a big deal, even if you are a gorilla. That's why staff at Bristol Zoo organised for little Kukeña to get a special treat on his big day.

The little gorilla - who weighs 7kg and stands around 45cm tall - was given a present including some of his favourite healthy food and a slice of birthday fruit cake.

Assistant curator of mammals, Lynsey Bugg, said: “Kukeña has come a long way over the past 12 months, he is becoming a proper little adventurer and loves to sneak off to explore when mum isn’t looking.

"Salome is a fantastic mum and is still very protective of her baby boy and keeps a close eye on him as he is still a bit too young to play with the other young gorillas as they tend to like a bit of rough and tumble.”


Parents will try anything to stop their baby from crying, but we'd love to know how many failed attempts it took before these parents realized the Star Wars theme tune would calm their crying baby.


A video, which has gone viral on YouTube, shows the screaming baby called Sebastian instantly calm down when a mobile phone playing the Star Wars theme tune is placed in his cot.

Writing on YouTube Sebastians parents wrote: "We discovered by accident that the Star Wars Theme Song has magical abilities to calm the baby down. He was screaming and crying in the car one day, and the MP3 player started playing this song and he just stopped.

"Then, every time after that when he'd be crying for no reason (we knew his diaper was clean, tummy was full, etc.) and we'd play this song, he'd perk right up.




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