Simon Crisp: April 2011 Archives

He's only one and a half years old, but Baerke van der Meij looks like he could be a football star of the future.

That's because the Dutch toddler has already secured a 'professional' contract after a video of him showing off his skills went viral.

In the clip, the little lad can be seen shooting three footballs into his toy box with amazing precision.

And it's not only YouTube viewers who were impressed by his skills, bosses at Venlose Voetbal Vereniging - where his granddad played - saw it and contacted the family.

He was then invited to join the more grown-up players for a training session before signing an albeit "symbolic" contract.

275x250.jpgA woman in Germany who was attacked by a pitbull dog, managed to escaped without serious injury... until police attending the attack accidentally shot her.

Officers had apparently been called to the incident in Berlin when neighbours heard the cried of a resident who was being bitten on her leg by the dog.

But by the time they arrived the woman was back in her own apartment so they tried to take the dog. However it could not be subdued and they took the decision to shoot it.

And that's when it happened, according to reports one ricocheting bullet hit a responding officer while another smashed through the apartment door… and hit the woman who'd just been savaged.

The unlucky woman was taken to hospital and received treatment for minor injuries. But no matter how bad her day was, the dog had a worse one, it was eventually killed.

275x250.jpgA man has somehow survived after apparently driving his car off the rim of the Grand Canyon and plunging 200ft, authorities have said.

Despite motoring off the South Rim of the tourist destination the 21-year-old is said to have climbed back to the rim of the canyon to seek help.

After flagging down another driver, the man was taken to hospital where he was treated for non-life threatening injuries.

National Park Service officials say his car was found lodged against a tree 200ft below the road and that there was another precipice about 10ft beyond the tree.

We know the Grand Canyon is one of the most spectacular sights on the Earth, but promise us that if you ever visit, you'll keep your eyes on the road while driving, right?

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

When Niklas Larsson discovered a moose just yards from his family plot near Stockholm, he tried to scare it away. Instead, the beast charged at him… until he put on this manly display. (Metro) (YouTube)

Some people get incredibly self-conscious about their bodies when working out at the gym. If you are one of them we suggest you never visit the Easy Gym in Spain, because gym-goers there can be seen working out in the buff. (The Sun)

The good folks over at Aol Weird News have taken a look at a museum dedicated to odd swallowed items, maybe so you don't have to. (Aol Weird News)

Baz Franks is really getting his teeth stuck into the whole royal wedding thing… he's had images of Prince William and Kate Middleton tattooed on his two front teeth. (WeInterrupt)

We can't say we've ever peeled a banana and thought "that would make a great sculpture of Elvis" -- Japanese artist Keisuke Yamada on the other hand… (Metro)

275x250.jpg Getting into the royal wedding mood, Heathrow Airport is rolling out half a kilometre of red carpet in a bid to give royal wedding travellers a greeting fir for a king.

In addition to the plush flooring - which will be in place in the arrivals halls from 27th to 29th April - they will also be handing out thousands of cups of Earl Grey tea.

To further mark the special occasion, passengers will have the chance to leave their own messages in wedding message books, which will be available in each terminal before being handed over to Clarence House.

Fingers crossed William and Kate won't be thinking of the happy day at some point in the future and leafing through the message books only to find someone had written: "They lost my bloody baggage, can you believe it!"

275x250.jpgThree lucky passengers flying from Milan to Madrid have each independently won cars worth £11,500 by playing an in-flight scratchcard game.

After the cards had been bought, a cheer is said to have gone up in the cabin as one player realised they'd won… and then another… and another.

But the flight was less fortunate for airline Ryanair - which sells the €2 scratchcards - because they normally only releases one free car into the game each month.

Despite being shocked and blaming the treble win on a 'printing error' they've said they will honour the winning cards… and any more which crop up.

You see they've hinted that there could be more errors, and therefore more winners, in the current print run of cards which are due to be used up to the end of June.

275x250.jpg With Kate Middleton set to become royalty when she marries Prince William on Friday, her whole life will change… apparently including her experience of things like roller coasters.

That's because theme park bosses have offered the happy couple an odd wedding present - a 24-carat gold plated roller coaster carriage to use whenever they visit the park.

Bosses at Alton Towers say the ‘Royaller-Coaster’ carriage used 20 square meters of 24-carat gold plating and will be reserved for the exclusive use of the royal couple on the free fall drop ride THI3TEEN

A spokesperson for the themepark said: "Everyone knows that marriage has its ups and downs but when Kate and Will tie the knot on April 29th the adage will take on quite a different meaning." Yes, they went there.

A paraplegic bunny, which was found in a US garden, has been given a new lease of life after a youngster created a tiny cart to help it get around.

Over Easter, the O'Rourke family in Tucson were surprised to discovered a pair of baby bunnies which had been abandoned by their mother, curled up in a corner of their yard, but they soon realised why.

One of the cute rabbits had no use of his hind legs and was going to struggle to survive in the wild, so the family decided to take the pair in a nurse them back to health.

But young Liam O'Rourke wasn't content with that, he also wanted to help the paraplegic bunny, called Joe, get around easier, so he set about building a small red and yellow wagon which straps onto the rear of the bunny and gives him improved mobility.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

It's not normally advisable to jab a crocodile in the eyes, but we guess if it's already got hold of your arm, it's got to be worth a try… as did this Australian man. (Telegraph)

When the automatic timer at a New Zealand supermarket accidentally opens the door and booted up the self check-out kiosks, it didn't have a problem finding customers, some didn't even notice the lack of employees. (Pocket Lint)

Annoyed at getting turned away from a pharmacy for not having the right paperwork this man was so pissed off he urinated on the cough drops. (Asylum)

When we told you about a machete flinging slingshot, we thought that was about as terrifying as catapults could get… that was until we saw this gatling gun slingshot. (YouTube)

We like videos of fail almost as much as we like beer, which means we don't know quite how to feel about this video of hundreds of bottles of beer falling over at a brewery ware house in Russia. (Live Leak)

We don't know too much about this video, but we do know it shows a mechanic pulling a massive snake from the engine of a car.

And really... what else do you need to know?

Engineers can be seen working on the engine of the Renault, before discovering the snake and slowly pulling it out.

As they lift it from the vehicle gathered onlookers gasp in shock, and it's not surprising, because the snake is massive.

It's not know what happened to the snake after it was extracted from the car… or whether the driver ever dared to get back in their car again.

275x250.jpgIt was once an essential item in any office, but the humble typewriter could soon be gone for good after the last factory producing them shut down production.

Godrej and Boyce has closed its production plant in Mumbai and say they only have around 200 machines still in stock.

While computers replaced typewriters years ago for much of the world, they remained popular in India, until recently when they finally lost out to new technologies.

Bosses at Godrej and Boyce - which started producing typewriters in the 1950s - say they were forced to halt production as orders began to dry up.
At one point they were selling 50,000 per year, but that dropped to under 800 last year… maybe they should have started taking orders over the internet.

275x250.jpgPresumably in a bid to produce the most bizarre royal wedding souvenir, a firm has announced it will sell bottles of 'Royal wedding day air'.

On the big day a team of "trained professionals" will apparently be out in London collecting samples of the air to capture the essence of the day.

Bosses at Watt UK say they hope the bottles could become a collectors item and insist they are "something for the whole family to enjoy".

It's claimed buyers could then treat the 'Royal Air' like a bottle of fine champagne and gather round the table each taking a healthy sniff.

There is no word on price yet… but if you really want to buy something like this, we've got a lovely selection of magic beans for sale? What if we called them 'Royal Wedding Magic Beans'.

We've seen enough pitch invasions to think there was nothing left which could surprise us... then Derry Felton rolled out onto the pitch in his wheelchair.

The 18-year-old quadriplegic Northampton Town fan invaded the in celebration of his team scoring against Rotherham and coming back from 2-0 down to get a much-needed draw.

Computer games programming student Felton says it's all a "bit of a blur" but that he'd made a bet with a pal about racing onto the pitch.

Fans cheered as Felton was chased across the turf by (albeit reluctant) security staff and a spokesman for the club said he would not be prosecuted for his pitch invasion

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

Diamonds, jewellery and cash are just some of the things we know crooks love to get their hands on. But a criminal duo in Chicago recently executed a well-planned heist for a more surprising item… buckets of human hair. (AP) (GuVid)

A group of teenage thieves who were targeting vans on a council estate got the shock of their lives when they broke in only to discover a four man SAS team inside on a counter-terrorism training exercise. (Sun)

This baseball fan thought it would be a good idea to ask her favourite player to marry her by waving a banner displaying her phone number. 200 calls and 600 text messages later we're guessing it doesn't seem so smart. (NBC Sports) (GuVid)

A human cannonball has plunged to his death when safety net failed and collapsed as the dare-devil shot through the air at a event in Kent. (Metro)

Tunbridge Wells is an unlikely setting for a story about a vigilante ninja patrolling the streets… but that's just what you'll get if you click this link. (Daily Mail)

A dare-devil skier has filmed himself flying off a cliff and performing a BASE jump to escape from the avalanche he'd just started.

Matthias Giraud had been traversing his way down a slope in the French Alps with the aim of filming himself building up speed and doing a BASE jump.

But as he made the leap and pulled his parachute, the footage from his head mounted camera shows him realised he's caused an avalanche which had been chasing him down the mountain.

So as the 27-year-old sailed down to safety, followed by pal Stefan Laud, the snow poured over the cliff like a waterfall. In fact the resulting footage is so good it could be used to advertise the head-mounted cameras… oh, it just has.

We're not sure how to describe this video, depending on how you like your viral videos, it's either a dog bursting bubbles, or a baby laughing at a dog bursting bubbles.

Either way it's absolutely great and if you don't enjoy it we're afraid to tell you you're dead on the inside.

In the minute-log clip a little girl called Molly can be seen laughing hysterically a her pet dog Bennie jumps around popping bubble with his mouth.

And that's it. But it's better than it sounds… as the 1,000,000 views it has received since being uploaded to YouTube earlier this month prove.

275x250.jpgWhen residents in Berlin heard a strange constant electric drilling-like noise coming from a neighbour's house late one night, they reported it to police.

And though some passers-by say the odd noise was so loud it could even be heard on the street, no-one could work out what was causing it.

So when officers arrived at the scene and were unable to get any response from the 23-year-old who lived there, they smashed the door down.

And at that point they discovered what had been buzzing away… a sex toy vibrator which had turned itself on and was rattling around on the wooden floor.

After 'neutralising' the offending device the cops left the scene and the woman will return home to find a bill for the smashed door… and some strange looks from her neighbours.

275x250.jpg If there's one thing cuter than the world’s smallest stallion running around a field, it's the same diminutive horse running around with a giant ball.

Which is lucky, because as it happens that's exactly what this video shows. Funny that, isn't it?

Last time we met Little Einstein, the tiny pinto stallion had just been named the world’s smallest stallion after measuring 35cm tall.

Breeders at Tiz A Miniature Horse Farm in New Hampshire had initially been worried the pint-sized foal was too small to survive.

But luckily their concerns were unfounded and Einstein now loves running around and playing football with a goat and a dog, as you do.

275x250.jpgA taxi driver in New York has picked up the fare of a lifetime -- after a couple of passengers wanted taking all the way to Los Angeles.

Mohammed Alam charged the duo $5,000 to make the 2,448-mile trip which took six days to complete.

While that might sound pricey - it would have been much faster and cheaper if flying - it's estimated the trip would have cost $17,000 (£10,000) if the meter had been running.

Investment banker John Belitsky and pal Dan Wuebben say they picked up the cab at LaGuardia Airport because they wanted to do something "magical".

And helping the couple achieve this, when they stopped in Las Vegas where they won $2,000… making the trip a snip at $3,000.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

This CCTV footage shows the moment a US airport was battered by a powerful tornado which blew windows out at the main terminal and ripped the roof off a concourse. (M&C) (YouTube)

Termites are said to have munched their way through a chest of 10 million rupees (£130,000) at a bank in India. (

A pair of scooter and skateboard riding dogs have been doing their stuff at Huffington Post Media Group's new headquarters. (Aol Weird News)

LA gang member Anthony Garcia has been convicted of murder and faces a lifetime in prison after police realised the tattoo on his chest was actually 'a map' of an unsolved murder. (Asylum)

We can't help but think the news desk knew exactly what they were doing when they dispatched TV reporter Marissa Mike to put together a piece on strong winds which were hitting Palm Springs. (KPS Local 2) (YouTube)

After beating Barcelona 1-0 to win the Copa del Rey - the Spanish equivalent of the FA cup - it was all looking great for Real Madrid… then this happened.

Taking the silverware on a celebratory open-topped bus tour of the capital, players including Ronaldo, Iker Casillas and Sergio Ramos were doing the usual waving of scarfs to cheering fans.

But as Ramos held the trophy aloft at the front of the bus - in a bid to get fans cheering even more - the butter-fingered defender somehow lost his grip and it fell.

Because the driver didn't see it fall, he promptly drove over the famous cup as on-lookers gasped in disbelief and emergency services ran to see if they could help.

While police and security officials were seen picking up pieces of the squashed trophy, it's not been confirmed how much damage was caused… though next year team could be competing for the Plate del Rey.

275x250.jpg The Wombles are set to recycle their musical career by reforming to play together at the Glastonbury Festival.

Great Uncle Bulgaria and co - who originally starred in a children's TV programme before turning their pointy noses to music - will play the the Avalon Stage at Glastonbury.

The five-piece had a number hits in the 1970s and all four of their gold disc-achieving albums plus the soundtrack to Wombling Free are to be re-released ahead of their performance on June 26.

The Wombles will appear alongside Barenaked Ladies, KT Tunstall and Newton Faulkner at the festival… and won't be the weirdest-looking people there. It's not known if they will take a tent of burrow under the fields.

275x250.jpgA musician has scooped a place in the record books, not for having a best selling album or massive attendance at a concert… but for having am overly wordy song title.

Mikhail Tank has secured his place in history by releasing a single with a 44 word title - that's more words than are included in the entire lyrics of some songs.

In fact the Russian born artist says the title of the digitally released single is so long it's not included on the cover-art.

While the single (available on Amazon) was released in October last year, Tank only recently received his Guinness World Records confirmation and certificate.

In case you were wondering, the song title is… "Simplify When You Get Crowded Inside, Certain Ones Prefer to Drink Your Energy, Falling Right Into The Hands of Time, Release Those Who Deprive, Throw Away Ties That Bind, Just Simplify, No Need to Overextend Yourself, When They Just Rely on Your Time. No."

275x250.jpgApple iPad users who take their gadget on holiday are being warned it could cost them 1,000 times more than in the UK.

Which? claim users simply checking emails, using GPS to get around, watching videos or updating their Facebook from outside the EU, can rack up huge bills.

That's because networks in some countries can charge users excessive data roaming charges - where it can cost £8 to upload a photo to show your friends back home.

It's said regular phone use on a two week holiday in France would cost less than £40, while it could cost up to £190 in the US... and around £300 from Russia.

And with per MB charges as high as £10 in some countries, it can cost this much to check in with your favourite blog… and even we don't think checking Newslite is worth that.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

Remember that dead alien which was found in Russia? Well it turns out it was a fake and made out of bread and chicken skin. (Asylum)

When doctors gave Wang Tianqing a routine CT scan in the hope of identifying what was causing his epilepsy, they were on the look out for anything unusual.. like the bullet lodged in his head. (DigTriad) (YouTube)

A disabled granny has fought off three muggers by head-butting one of them after she was tipped out of her mobility scooter. (SWNS)

A bar which ran a series of goldfish races has cancelled the events after protests from PETA. The goldfish have already forgotten all about it. (Aol Weird News)

Ouch! A footballer has been hospitalised after an end of season party got out of hand and he had a pool cue shoved up his backside. (Mirror)

275x250.jpg A sheriff dubbed "America's Toughest" has unveiled an online "Mugshot of the Day" competition, where members of the public are asked to vote for the photo they find most amusing.

Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio launched the online service saying: "I want people to turn to see if their neighbour's been arrested."

It allows users to view arrestees by the type of crime they are accused of - ranging from robbery and theft to DUI and fraud - and vote on their mugshot of the day.

Unsurprisingly winners tend to be dishevelled and unusual-looking suspects… though none have matched the brilliance of the man with a forehead tattoo or the guy who was getting his hair done as he was arrested.

A video of Russian President Dmitry Medvedev dancing has become an online hit - despite his moves making Ann Widdecombe look like Michael Jackson.

The footage - which shows Medvedev doing his stuff to the 1990s pop hit "American Boy" - attracted hundreds of comments within hours of hitting the web.

Wearing a silver jacket and no tie, he can be seen awkwardly moving from side to side and kicking his heels up at a university reunion last year.

Answering substantial criticism of his dance moves, Medvedev took to Twitter where he said: "The dances/music are those, from the past."

Many commenters said that he had some way to go before he was anywhere near as good as Boris Yeltsin at dancing.

275x250.jpg At first glance they may just look like the logos from some of the biggest brands in the world. But on closer inspection you'll see that these are 'honest logos'.

A graphic designer from Sweden has tinkered with the instantly recognisable logos to make them more descriptive and honest.

So the YouTube logo has seen the words switched for "Cat Videos" while Facebook has become "Procrastination" and Nintendo is now "Nothing To Do".

Personally we don't know whether to be more impressed by the quality of the logos or how accurately Viktor Hertz has summed up some of the brands. Excuse us while we go and update our Procrastination page.

275x250.jpgResearch has found that people who go on cruise holidays drink more alcohol than those who opt to holiday on dry land.

A study of 1,198 people who had been on cruise holidays discovered that 76 percent of them claimed to drink more when at sea.

In fact the majority of people on a cruise were found to consume 5-8 alcoholic beverages per day - considerably more than land loving holiday makers.

Asked why they drank more at sea, people said it was both because they felt safer in the contained environment -- and because it was "all inclusive".

So the general conclusion of the study is that people will drink more if the booze if free. We're just as surprised as you.

275x250.jpg If you were in the market for a new TV and had £17,000 to spend, we guess you'd want something 3D, HD and with a bigger screen than we've got walls.

But someone recently splashed out £16,800 on Britain's oldest working TV -- which has a 12-inch black and white screen.

The 1936 Marconi type–702 television - which was originally bought for £100 - had been expected to sell for £5,000 when it was auctioned by Bonhams.

Hopefully the new owner will have more luck than the first... three days after the purchase the Crystal Palace transmitter burned down and they couldn't receive pictures again until 1946.

WNWDW: Dangling burglar needed rescuing

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

Burglars do not normally look forward to emergency services turning up while they are still at the scene - but this suspected robber seemed happy to see firefighters when he became stuck on the side of a building in China. (The Sun)

Alleviating our concerns that the inevitable mechanical uprising is imminent, a robot has thrown the first pitch at a Major League Baseball game‚ badly. That's got to give us a couple of years before we're enslaved by the machines, right? (Engadget)

After falling ill and suffering internal bleeding while on a cruise ship off the coast of Norway, 73-year-old Janet Richardson probably didn't think it could get much worse… until paramedics dropped her into the icy sea. (Daily Mail)

A spoof vampire video has been released by the NHS in a bid to get more men to visit the dentist. In the tongue-in-cheek video a woman is seen rejecting a vampire because of the state of his gnashers. (Daily Mail)

We don't know how burglars pick which houses they raid, but if we saw this sign warning that our heads would be blown off if we picked this one, we think we'd give it a miss. (KTRE)

275x250.jpg Our favourite brewers are at it again. And this time the crazy guys at Brewdog have created a beer called 'Royal Virility Performance' to mark the forthcoming Royal Wedding.

But as you'd expect from the people who created the world's strongest beer and served a brew in dead animals, this is no ordinary beer… it's said to be laced with viagra.

In fact they claim the aphrodisiac-filled India Pale Ale means that drinking three of the 7.5 per cent ABV bottles is the equivalent of taking one Viagra pill.

And it doesn't end there. Packaging on the bottles includes line like "Arise Prince Willy" and makers say they've sent some for the Prince to have a stiff drink on his wedding night.

275x250.jpg Researchers have predicted that Brits will shell out a collective £163 MILLION on Wills and Kate royal wedding souvenirs.

One in five patriotic adults are expected to purchase a Royal collectable - with the average spend coming in at £17.

In total that comes to £163… which is a awful lot of mugs, tea-towels and plates featuring Prince William and Kate Middleton staring back at us.

However, the poll of 2,000 people revealed seven in ten won’t admit the souvenirs purchases to friends or family for fear of been mocked. That probably include those with royal wedding condoms.

Dame Helen Mirren has been left red-faced after accidentally swearing during an appearance on BBC Breakfast.

Mirren had been on the BBC1 show promoting the remake of Arthur - where she co-stars with Russell Brand - when she made the blunder.

Discussing John Gielgud's part in the original movie, and the language he used, she couldn't help herself from doing an impression.

And that's when Mirren said: "Well, in that sort of wonderful voice he had... You little s**t." Drawing gasps from Sian Williams and Bill Turnbull.

Instantly recognising her blunder, the 65-year-old actress gasped and covered her mouth… which even though she's an Oscar-winner, we think was a genuine response.

275x250.jpg It can be towed by a mobility scooter, measures just 2m by 75cm and is being suggested as a way of bagging a spot for the Royal Wedding… meet the world's smallest caravan.

Despite the diminutive measurements the £5,500 QTvan caravan still boasts a full-sized bed, a 19 inch television, a drinks cabinet and tea making facilities.

Optional extras include solar roof panels, a SKY TV satellite dish, a games console, extra-wide wing mirror for mobility scooter and custom paint jobs.

And makers say the mini caravan is so small that if you need anything else, you could even tow it into a supermarket… though don't expect to get there too quickly, it has a top speed of 6mph.

No, we're almost certain it doesn't. But that hasn't stopped the footage - which claims to show the body of a dead alien - from going viral online.

Uploaded last week, the clip is said to be shot in in Russia's Irkutsk region and shows the mangled remains of an alien lying in the snow.

It's claimed the person filming it went out with their camcorder after villagers saw a series of bizarre pink and blue lights in the sky.

He then found the familiar triangular-faced 'alien' which appears to have suffered a horrific accident, including the loss of one leg.

But while the scene is said to have been investigated by Emergencies Ministry staff, most online commenters are calling fake.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

An umbrella which is designed to look like a Samurai sword when worn on the back, has sparked a massive police response at a US shopping mall… when five people reported it looked like a rifle. (AZ Central)

A brave sheriff’s deputy in Dallas has conducted a daring rescue in which he smashed his way into a burning car to save the driver. (My Fox)

Sometimes we warn you an article might contain bad language or gruesome images. This one doesn't, though it should come with a cuteness overload warning. Meet Cookie the tiny penguin who loves being tickled. (Daily Mail)

TV newsreader Natalie Barr had the rest of her team in hysterics when she mixed up the words version and virgin in a recent report about a life-sized Barbie. (Asylum)

Studies have found that oral sex puts men at increased risks of cancer. (Aol Weird News

275x250.jpgA hotel chain is offering tourists in London during the royal wedding the chance to sleep with Prince William and Kate Middleton. Well almost.

On the evening of 28th April, guests staying in certain London Premier Inn hotels will have the chance to sleep under special royal wedding bedding.

Images of Prince William and Kate Middleton’s bodies, will be printed on a limited selection of duvets which can be requested by guests on a first come first served basis.

As sleepers then get into bed and line their head with the printed bodies, they can pretend to be the future King and Queen for the night.

Hopefully people don't have to try sleeping in those position though… and it might not work if your wife insists on sleeping on the left side of the bed.

A blooper which saw an Australian news anchor silently fixing her hair on live TV rather than reading the headlines, has become an online hit.

Kate Collins was waiting to go live on 9 News Adelaide earlier this week… while she was actually on air.

That meant viewers at home saw the usual intro graphics and music before the camera cut to Collins who was staring at herself on a monitor. She then proceeded to check her hair.

And that was it, no words, no news, but YouTube gold. Though given this was the same team who brought us the classic 'small but impressive' quip, we can't help but wonder if they just have a taste for the viral.

275x250.jpgAnother London Marathon has come and gone, and while most runners wanted to achieve their best time, few would have thought they had a shot at a world record.

But that's where they were wrong. 35 new Guinness World Records were achieved at the 2011 Virgin London Marathon… in some pretty odd categories.

Runners this year set records such as the fastest marathon completed on crutches and the most Rubik’s cubes solved whilst running a marathon.

Other crazy records included the fastest marathon dressed as a superhero, the fastest marathon while carrying 60 lb pack and the money raised by a marathon runner.

So next year, we will not only be setting out to compete in the London Marathon, but also seeing if we can't become record holders in the process… is there a record for the fastest marathon quitter?

275x250.jpgA toilet costing a £3,900 is set to go on sale - complete with a touch-screen computer panel, a built-in sound system and foot-warming hot air vents.

The Numi is designed to give users who are feeling a bit flush one of the most luxurious toilet-based experience possible.

Made from ceramic and glass the designer loo even recognises when someone is approaching and automatically opens the seat.

It then aims to calm those using it with ambient lighting, pre-programmed music or the radio and all the functions can be controlled by the iPhone-like computer panel.

What do you think, are there many people who are feeling flush enough to splash out on something like this, or is the idea crap?

275x250.jpg Bubble-blowing history has been made after bubble fan Samsam Bubbleman set a new world record for blowing the most bubbles blown inside another bubble.

The bubbleologist (yes that's apparently a thing) managed to blow a breathtaking 71 bubbles inside another giant bubble that measured approximately 47cm in diameter.

His creation took Samsam over two hours to blow and is said to have required perfect timing and conditions including low wind speed, low humidity and, of course, no rain.  

Luckily he didn't blow his chance at setting the world record, well he did, but only in the good way, if you get what we mean.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

When tornados recently hit Jackson in Michigan, it trashed homes and destroyed cars. But as local news reporters discovered, Eric Hubbard has a more pressing issue... it stole his hamburger. (YouTube)

Police in South Africa say a man who'd had an argument with his girlfriend may have committed suicide by walking into a crocodile-infested river where he's understood to have been eaten alive. (Emirates247)

People often complain that the service they get from the mail man is crap… well this US postal worker seems to have taken it literally. (Aol Weird News)

A stowaway cat has been found after making a 2,200 mile journey in sealed shipping container. It's thought Douglas the cat survived by drinking condensation on the inside of the container. (Asylum)

Okay it didn't know what it was doing, but a polar bear cub at a zoo in Denmark has done a rather impressive Winnie the Pooh impression after getting his head stuck in a bucket. (Daily Mail) (YouTube)

275x250.jpg A group of thrill-seeking vicars have braved a series of theme park rides at Alton Towers and Thorpe Park, as they competed for the title of Extreme Vicar'.

The dare-devil clergy were auditioning to conduct a special service at the theme parks on Easter Sunday and had to prove they were up to the challenge.

Because the special service will be hosted both on the ground and whilst hurtling around at extreme speeds, the vicars were asked to try reading from the bible as they 'enjoyed' the rides.

A spokesperson for Alton Towers said they were judged on their willingness to hold an alternative service, experience of varied working environments and… their ability to hold mass at 50mph. Quite a test of faith.

275x250.jpgDutch traffic bosses have been left seeing red after someone altered a set of pedestrian lights to show a couple having sex.

Every time the light turns green in the town of Nimwegen, an illuminated image of a couple having sex flashes up, instead of the more traditional person walking.

And apparently the prank has been causing traffic congestion - because people want to see the risque image they're pressing the button, even when they don't want to cross.

Transport officials have now launched an investigation how the images was manipulated, with suspected computer hackery being top of the list.

A Town Hall spokesman said: "We are looking at who had access and opportunity"… presumably that will be cross-referenced with a list of people who have a good sense of humour.

275x250.jpg Postal bosses in the US have been left red-faced after it was discovered the Statue of Liberty featured on a new stamp was in fact a replica.

Rather than displaying the face of the iconic New York landmark, a photo had been used of a 1997 replica which stands outside a casino in Las Vegas.

The blunder was spotted by an eagle-eyed stamp collector after he noticed several detail differences between the stamp and the original statue - including the fact that windows in Liberty's crown were painted on.

Unfortunately the find was made a little too late for any changes to be made… because three billion of the 44-cent (27p) stamps have already been printed.

275x250.jpgWe don't normally do 'On this day…' type posts, but it's not too common* for us to be able to say, on this day in 1930, the BBC announced there was no news.

But on April 18, 1930, during what should have been a 6:30pm radio news bulletin, that's exactly what happened.

A BBC presenter announced "Good evening. Today is Good Friday. There is no news." It had been apparently judged that nothing newsworthy had happened.

Piano music was then played instead of the current affairs update for a couple of minutes, before normal scheduling resumed.

* Okay, we would be able to say this once a year, but this is the first time, and we won't do it again next year. Honest.

Ooh ER! A spoof royal wedding video showing Prince William and Kate Middleton dancing their way up the aisle has become an online hit.

The video - which was produced by mobile phone firm T-Mobile and has been seen online five million times - starts off looking like someone has taken a camcorder into the upcoming royal wedding.

But that's only until the East 17 starts blaring out on a stereo and a series of regal look-a-likes from Princess Anne to Prince Harry (some more dubious than others) start dancing through the faux Westminster Abbey.

And while all your favourite dancing royals are there it's really the Archbishop Of Canterbury who steals the show… and if Rowan Williams sees this you just know he will be tempted to bust a few moves on the big day.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

A cyclist in China had a very lucky escape when he jumped off his bike just seconds before it was crushed by an overturning container lorry. Other road users watched on in horror as the speeding lorry crashed in front of them. (ITN)

Even when they're talking about teams you've never heard of, competing in sports you don't really care about, there's something infectious about over-excited sports commentators. (Yahoo)

A mortuary in California has launched drive-by grieving by putting an open casket behind a display window. (Asylum)

It was a big sporting weekend, but at Newslite we were not bothered by the FA Cup semi-finals, the London marathon or the Chinese Grand Prix… for us this weekend was all about the annual office chair race in Germany. (Local) (YouTube)

An American Mensa member says he never gets bored, that's because John Hornberger has a collection of 1,140 board games. (Aol Weird News)

275x250.jpg A bizarre-looking duck has been scaring off other birds on his canal - because he sports a mohawk and a punk rock attitude.

Bearing a resemblance to Johnny Rotten or Billy Idol, 'Punk Duck' - of the Worcestershire canal - is said to have been terrorising the local birdlife.

Locals say his unique-looks and rowdy behaviour have made him an outcast among his fellow birds in Stourport - but he's proved more popular with residents.

Many have started taking photos of his unusual hair-do and with the school holidays he's has become something of a tourist attraction for locals… not that he gives a duck.

A man in Turkey is lucky to be alive after a massive metal shed was lifted up by a gust of wind and smashed into him.

The unidentified man was walking along a road in the town of Bursa when hight winds caught the metal shack.

Despite weighing about a tonne the shack was lifted from the ground and sent hurling towards the unlucky man.

It then smashed into him before hitting power cables and colliding with a van. Emergency services closed the road for several hours as they cleared the wreck.

Though he was injured, the man is said to have somehow survived the accident. We have no idea how.

275x250.jpg While most people get annoyed by fingerprint smudges on the screen of their iPad, a graphic designer decided to use them to learn about how the Apple tablet is used.

New Yorker George Kokkinidis says he was interested in exploring the many different ways people interact with the popular tablet computer.

So the 33-year-old started off by cleaning the screen with a microfibre cloth and using a range of apps before photographing the marks left on the screen.

These were then traced in Adobe Illustrator to enhance them so they could be better analysed… well that's one way to use an iPad, we'd rather play Angry Birds.

There's nothing new about tall buildings being struck by lightning, but that doesn't make seeing the Empire State Building getting hit three times in rapid succession any less impressive.

Which explains why footage showing the moment the iconic New York building was recently hit several times, has gone viral online.

Since it was uploaded to YouTube after the storm on Tuesday night, the video has been watched more than 110,000 times.

While some people have said they're 'shocked' the lightning didn't cause any damage, it's hardly surprising… the 103-story skyscraper is struck an average of 100 times a year.

So should you ever find yourself trapped in the past and in need of 1.21 gigawatts of power, may we suggest you hang around the Empire State Building.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

Stop whatever you are doing! Surgeons, put down that scalpel, Firefighers turn off that hose… Kate Middleton's face has been found on jelly bean. Now you can carry on. (Metro)

Walter Breuning, the world's oldest man, has died in the US at the age of 114. He said the secret to his long life was a strict regime of two meals a day and keeping fit. (BBC)

No-one likes going to see the doctor. But that could be different if more medical professionals spent as much time practicing as Dr Trick Shot. Trick shot videos will never be the same, nor will seeing your GP. (NBC Sport)

An artist has created a subway car that looks like a giant fish. Seriously, what are you still doing here? Click the lick to check out a photo. (Aol Weird News)

A man who was watching videos in a private booth at a porn shop when he  burst into flames is said to be fighting for his life. (Asylum

275x250.jpg Bookies recently gave punters the chance to bet on what would be served as the main course at the wedding dinner of Prince William and Kate Middleton. Offering odds of 50/1 it would be pizza.

Well we wonder what odds they would give that this royal wedding pizza portrait would be making its way to plates at the event?

The odd pizza has been created by food artists working for Papa John’s as a way of celebrating the forthcoming marriage (and getting Papa John’s mentioned in the news).

Kate’s veil is made from mushrooms and her dress from cheese, while William’s morning suit has been created out of salami and peppers… that's the pizza we're talking about, not the clothes for the big day.

275x250.jpgSongs like 'I Will Survive' 'My Way' and 'Dancing Queen' could soon be getting competition on the karaoke circuit… from sea shanties.

Karaoke firm Sunfly say that they've recently been bombarded with requests from people who want to sing sea shanties on a night out.

As a result they will now be adding classics like 'When the boat comes in' 'Drunken sailor' and 'Leave Her Johnny' to their music library.

It's thought the demand is being driven by the popularity of the Young’s Seafood adverts featuring the famous ‘When the Boat Comes in’ and ‘Drunken Sailor’

Either way you should expect to hear more drunk renditions of sea shanties coming to a karaoke bar near you fairly soon.

275x250.jpg Fashion students have got the whiff of success after creating a range of cheese couture... including these suitably cheesy shoes.  

The cheese-based fashion has been crafted by students from Bath Spa University to promote regional produce and will go on show at the Royal Bath and West Show.

Lisa Dillon made these "Jimmy Cheese" shoes using West Country cheddar and bread, sculpting the heel from a block of Cheddar and using a stale cheese sandwich for part of the platform sole.

The front was then moulded from more Cheddar and extra melted cheese was shaped to embellish the design… we think they really take the biscuit… but you might think they stink.

Police in China say they were shocked to discover a man driving down a busy street on two bumper cars, which we think is understandable.

Bizarre CCTV footage shows the bonkers man driving along road in Taizhou, Zhejiang Province, on the bright yellow cars.

He's seen positioned between the two cars - with one foot in each to operate the pedals - as he navigates other traffic and junctions.

When police pulled him over, he told them he was transporting them to a local park and it was the cheapest way of doing it.

Amazingly "because the law doesn't stipulate what punishment a bumper car driver should receive" he was apparently let off with a warning.

275x250.jpgMore than 6,000 Lego fans have spent four days building the world's tallest Lego-based tower in Sao Paulo, Brazil.

The volunteers used 500,000 of the famous little bricks to construct the multicoloured monolith which measured 31.19m tall.

Bosses from Lego even sent officials from Denmark to oversee the rising of the structure from the shopping centre car-park.

And while most of the builders were children, they needed a bit of help getting the top brick in place, well it was 31m high and none of them had a crane operating licence.

Asked whether it had been hard work breaking the 2008 record which was set in Chilie, some of the Lego fans said it had been child's play.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

Police in Russia are hunting for a hypnotist robber who has been caught on CCTV putting elderly bank customers into trances before stealing their cash. (Metro)

It's not looking good for the Mexican language of Ayapaneco. Not only are there just two people left who can speak it fluently… but they're no longer on speaking terms. (Guardian)

Given the strict regulations about what items you're allowed to take onto a plane, we find it hard to believe anyone thought this would be okay -- but  a couple are said to have tried checking a dead cow onto a transatlantic flight. (Metro)

Thousands of people in Thailand have drenched each other to help set a new Guinness World Record for world's largest water pistol fight. (Telegraph)

In case you ever needed proof that you picked the wrong degree course, it's just been revealed that a professor at La Salle University in Philadelphia took strippers and lap dancers to seminars. (Aol Weird News)

The President of the Czech Republic has been left red-faced after a video of him admiring and then pocketing a pen during a press conference, became an online hit.

Vaclav Klaus had been taking part in the news conference with Chilean President Sebastian Pinera when news cameras caught the leader admiring the writing implement.

He was then clearly seen to discreetly slide the pen under the desk before putting it in his pocket to take home from his visit to Chile.

However, while internet commenters have labelled him a pen thief, aides say that he has the right to keep pens given to him on state visits. Yes, free stationary… that's why these people get into politics.

275x250.jpgWe've all been there, you've taken a phone call while sitting on the loo and hope the person you're talking with won't notice.

Well here's a bit of Newslite advice, don't flush the toilet… especially if you happen to be a politician giving a live radio interview from your home.

Unfortunately this warning comes a bit late for Israeli politician Avigdor Lieberman who is said to have recently made this exact mistake - much to the amusement of radio listeners.

The foreign minister had been talking about the issue of a flare-up of violence with Palestinian Islamist group Hamas when his point was punctuated by impromptu flushing.

Which has got to be em-bare-assing. In face we bet he's hoping rival politicians don't kick up a stink about his gaffe, otherwise he could have flushed away his career.

A man has been arrested after being caught on CCTV stealing a judge's gavel from a courtroom... meaning he could be making a quick return for contempt.

When magistrate Chris Cook recently reached for his gavel during a hearing, he realised it had disappeared and ordered a search.

But security footage soon revealed that the small mallet had been swiped the day before, right from his legal bench at Lorain Municipal Court.

While staff didn't recognise the courtroom crook, they noticed that the man with him had appeared in court that day and police were able to locate the gavel grabber.

The magistrate said that if the crook is willing and able to return the gavel, he would be a lot less inclined to bring him back in for contempt… he just loves banging that little mallet you see.

275x250.jpg If you look like one of these people, well congratulations… because you have the facial traits which are most likely to lead to business success and a bulging bank balance.

Researchers who have studied the faces of the richest men and women in the UK claim they have identified certain facial features are surprisingly common amongst the super-rich.

After noticing that rich men tend to have a Roman nose, wide set eyes and flared nostrils, while wealthily women have long philtrums, high foreheads and flared eyebrows, they created these images.

And what a pair of lookers the composites of people including Lakshmi Mittal, Roman Abramovich and Sir Phillip Green are… it almost makes us glad we never get to sit in first class.

275x250.jpgIf women really want an honest opinion about a potential new outfit, they take their mother out on their shopping spree, it has been found.

Researchers who polled 2,000 women discovered that many think  that shopping with girlfriends can be a minefield of jealousy, false compliments and complex mind games.

By contrast, mothers tend to be brutally honest if they don't like something and complimentary if they does - explaining why a third of women would rather shop with mom than anyone else.

Shopping with mothers was also found to be more focused and productive than an outing with pals who often waste time nattering.

And it seems fears of jealousy are well founded. One in 20 women admitted telling a friend they look great in something when they looked awful - because they didn't want them to look better than them.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

A statue of a naked Apollo, which was banned from being on display in Nice for 22 years because it was thought to be too well-endowed, is set to re-erected. Yes we went there. (Aol Weird News)

A drug addict who jumped from a 70ft crane as rescuers tried to bring him to safety, somehow survived with hardly any injuries after landing on a three foot deep pile of snow. (Austrian Times) (LiveLeak)

Would-be jewellery thieves were caught out by tough display cases which they were unable to break into despite having a hammer and a shotgun. (Asylum)

This video shows the chilling moment a commuter plane at New York's JFK airport was spun around as it was clipped by an Air France Airbus A380. (Telegraph)

A farmer says he has been forced to dye his flock bright orange in a bizarre bid to stop crooks from stealing them. (Daily Mail)

275x250.jpg Despite his diminutive size, Tiny Tim the tortoise has become a big attraction at Whipsnade Zoo... and it's not hard to see why.

Just take a look at the Egyptian tortoise - who weighed just 6g when he hatched - chilling next to this grape.

Zoo bosses say he was part of a litter born to a group of tortoises seized by HM Customs and Excise last year, which were destined for the illegal pet trade

Right about now you may be wondering "Why is Tiny Tim pictured pushing his nose against a grape?" Well we don't know... and in our experience it's best not to question these things too much.

275x250.jpg Italian perfumers have created a bizarre range of blood-scented fragrances which are designed to celebrate the "vivid and fascinating liquid that flows in our veins".

Blood Concept is a collection of four whiffs - A, B, AB and O - and all have a metallic scent at their heart which is said to be inspired by the red stuff.

Makers say the 40ml bottles (with dropper) are expected to become a hit after they were revealed at a recent perfumery trade show in Milan.

A spokesperson for Blood Concept said the perfumes were based on blood because it's the most studied part of the human body and holds a multitude of secrets… that and the world only needs so many vanilla-based perfumes.

275x250.jpgHe was trying to take a shortcut home from a music festival by wading through the middle of a lake, but not everything went to plan for Shane Parker.

That's because the 21-year-old took a wrong turn and became stuck neck-deep in mud and surrounded by potentially lethal tiger snakes.

He then spent the next seven hours trying to avoid the snakes while screaming for help, which came in the form of a man walking his dog the following morning.

Rescue workers were called and the mud-covered music fan was winched out of the muddy lake by helicopter, luckily managing to escape serious injury.

After bringing him back to land fire fighter used their hoses to wash him off… all the more embarrassing given there were TV cameras there.

275x250.jpg A "super bus" which carries 23 passengers and can reach speeds of 155mph could be the future of your morning commute, if researchers get their way.

The Superbus is an eco-friendly vehicle and the brainchild of Dutch astronaut Wubbo Ockels who is now a professor of aerospace sustainable engineering.

While with it's streamlined design and wing-opening doors, it looks more like a super-car than a regular bus, the superbus is being touted as the the future of public transport.

Unfortunately the electric vehicle - which cost €13m to develop - might not be hitting UK streets just yet, it's currently on show at a trade fair in Dubai.

275x250.jpgPolice in Oklahoma County have released details of a wanted criminal who has been vandalising a series of police cars over the past few weeks.

He's described as having, brown eyes, greyish brown hair and is about 5 to 7 inches tall… oh yeah, did we mention he's a squirrel?

Oklahoma County Sheriff's Office say the vandalising vermin has been jumping down from a tree and onto official vehicles.

Once there he's been getting under the hood and chewing through wiring, so far he has caused $700 worth of damage.

Cops are now working with animal control officers to help them get there, er, squirrel.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

New Yorkers have been given UFO hotline to call if they have seen something unusual and unexplainable in the sky. 68-year-old retiree Joseph Capp set up the phone-line because he says it can be a shock to people. (Aol Weird News)

An Indonesian lawmaker has resigned after he was caught on camera watching porn on a tablet computer while in parliament. Arifinto had previously helped pass a tough anti-pornography law. (Asylum)

A blind water-skier has set a new world record by travelling 23.85 miles around Anglesey in an hour, while wearing a blindfold to comply with the rules. (Metro)

Actors often say it is an emotional moment when one of their characters is killed off. Well spare a thought for Law Lok-lam, the Hong Kong actor died on five different soap operas in a 24-hour period last week. (ABC)

A boxer who was not happy about being disqualified in the tenth round after an intentional headbutt decided to throw a series of punches at the referee. (Asylum)

275x250.jpg This shopping centre had some decidedly under-dressed shoppers at the weekend... as hordes of underwear-clad women competed to win £100 gift vouchers.

Lakeside Shopping Centre in Essex gave the prizes to the first 100 women to turn up on Sunday morning in nothing but their bra, panties and high heels.

After getting the gift card the girls who had dared to bare were then encouraged to hit the shops and buy themselves a new outfit.

However, while women had already got a pair of hight heels on, a surprisingly high number of them headed straight for the shoe shops… which must have made their walk home interesting.

When Robert Wood felt a gun pushed into the side of his neck as he was doing some banking, he assumed it was a pal playing a trick on him.

It wasn't, he actually was being held up a gunpoint… but that didn't stop the 61-year-old telling the robber from telling he wasn't getting his cash.

Wood had just cashed a cheque for $200 in Massachusetts when the bank robber pointed the gun at him and demanded he put the cash in a bag.

But even after realising this wasn't a friendly prank, Wood wasn't going to give him the money and threw the bag back at him.

The robber then turned his attention the to tellers. Meanwhile Wood says his wife is always telling him he doesn't take anything seriously.

275x250.jpg Bosses at London Zoo have got such a problem with kleptomaniac monkeys they've had to come up with a cunning plan to dissuade them from their criminal ways.

Keepers at the zoo say their 18 Bolivian squirrel monkeys have started stealing sunglasses from visitors walking through their exhibit.

It's thought the pesky primates are attracted by the shiny surfaces and their own reflections in the lens, and that this is why they grab the glasses off peoples' heads.

As a result the keepers will now give the light-fingered monkeys sunglasses with bitter apple smeared on them (a taste they hate) to try to put them off… meaning they could get them back with something else smeared on them.

275x250.jpgThe average Brit wastes £194.71 per year, simply because they are on the wrong mobile phone contract, it has been found.

Ofcom approved researchers discovered that 76 percent of people on monthly deals are paying over the odds because they are on the wrong contract.

More than half of people (52%) have a tariff which is too large (meaning they consistently have unused minutes, texts and data allowance.

And 29% of people are on a tariff which is too small and then end up paying over the odds for additional uses. Apparently that works out to £4.9bn per year.

It was also found that the average person spends £439 a year on their mobile phone and now uses twice as much data as they did last year. You know, to update Facebook even more.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

Police in Texas have been accused of using excessive force after reaching for the pepper-spray when dealing with a baby squirrel. Cops have defended the actions saying the animal was suspected of having rabies. (Canoe) (Youtube)

The FBI has released a memo from 1950 which states that 'three so-called flying saucers' had been recovered in New Mexico. Does this prove aliens landed at Roswell? (Asylum)

This student was probably hoping to make a name for himself when he stood up in the middle of a lecture, stripped off to a Superman outfit and ran out, and in a way he did… just not how he would have liked. (Nine MSN)

Ever wondered what would happen if a tractor went rogue in a supermarket car park? No, neither have we. But if we had, this video would be compulsory viewing. (Autoblog) (YouTube)

And our odd animal friendship of the day goes to a deer and a nesting goose who appear to have become best buddies inside a Buffalo cemetery. (Aol Weird News)

275x250.jpg A group of 40 knitting enthusiasts have spent months painstakingly using their skills to recreate some of the world's most famous art masterpieces.

Using knitting, embroidery and crochet the 'Materialistics' tackled works ranging from The Scream by Edvard Munch, to the famous Vincent Van Gogh sunflowers.

Each Saturday morning the craft-lovers would meet at the The Customs House art centre in Tyne and Wear to plan the 'A Grand Tour' project which is now on show.

The then used their needles to recreate their textile versions of things like  the famous Marilyn Monroe series by Andy Warhol… or should that be Andy Woolhol.

275x250.jpgHe may not have quite as much money as Bill Gates, but Scrooge McDuck has topped the Forbes list of the wealthiest fictional characters.

Each year Forbes magazine - known for their coverage of all which is wealthy and powerful - turns their eye to fictional empires.

Using the same rigorous scrutiny as used when compiling their various lists of the wealth, they produced the Fictional 15, a list of the richest characters from television, film, comics and books.

And it was gold coin collecting Scrooge McDuck who came top, with it being judged that he has a worth of $44 billion this year as a result of soaring gold prices.

Carlisle Cullen from Twilight came second with an estimated wealth of $36.2 billion and Artemis Fowl II was third with $13.5 billion.

275x250.jpg We have a feeling using this dog leash in public could get you a bit of unwanted attention from the RSPCA and quite possibly police.

That's because Lebedev Studio designed it to look like you are shooting your pet pooch in the head as you take it for daily walkies.

Dubbed Povodokus, the gun-shaped handle contains a bright red lead which goes out freely as the dog pulls and reels in when you pull the trigger.

While creator Andrey Dyakov, says he came up with the idea as a concept, he told Newslite they've not ruled out taking it into production. Your move now PETA..

A US man has had a relatively lucky escape after he was hit by a car and knocked through the window of a store in a terrifying accident.

CCTV footage shows convenience store worker Guillermo Ramirez was walking outside a store in Miami when a car ploughed onto the pavement and hit him.

The car carried on going and flew inside the Kwik Stop shop, bouncing Ramirez off the bonnet and through the window.

Amazingly (you'll agree once you've seen the video) he only suffered a few bumps and bruises and an injury to his hand.

As for the driver, they clearly couldn't find they were looking for in the impromptu drive-thru, they sped off shortly after the accident.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

Police in the US have released a video of a naked man shooting an AK-47 at a $65,000 SWAT team robot. Yes you read that correctly. (WFTV) (YouTube)

A dog begging at the side of a dining table is nothing new, but they normally do it  for scraps of food, not a bucket full of cash. A homeless man in the US has trained his dog to beg for him. (Telegraph)

A man in Ohio is claiming woof justice after he was charged with allegedly barking at a police dog. (Aol Weird News)

As any football fan knows, there are good penalties, bad penalties… and ones you just have to watch over and over again. (Asylum)

We all know there are some pretty stupid drivers our there. But just in case you need the proof, here's a video of someone doing 50mph on a highway… backwards. (Jalopnik)

275x250.jpg Boffins at BAE Systems have successfully tested the ejector seat for the F-35 Lightning II fighter jet... but only after building a rocket sled first. As you do.

Because the fighter jet will be capable of travelling at 600mph, they needed to be sure the ejector seat would work fast enough, and they needed to test it.

So they set about building a 600mph rocket sled on rails at Chalgrove Airfield in Oxfordshire, and then gave the job of testing it to a crashtest dummy.

The dummy was then fired from the replicated F-35 cockpit as the sled sped along with flames coming out of the back... Wow our job feels boring now, how can we become BAE engineers?

275x250.jpgBad-tempered Brits spend three-and-a-half years of their lives angry or in a bad mood, a study has revealed.

Researchers found the typical adult has the hump for an hour and 19 minutes a day, with bad customer service, automated phone systems and commuting the most common triggers.

Work problems, money worries and having to deal with family issues also leave  a dark cloud hanging over millions of Brits.

The study of 2,000 people also found daily irritations include time spent queuing, dog mess in the street and learner drivers.

Eight percent of people even said they start to feel aggrieved at the mere sight of a traffic warden on patrol… while just typing the words get us annoyed.

Think about the worst aspect of your job, we bet it's nothing in comparison with this guy. He's in charge of cleaning out this cobra pit… with his hands and a broom.

This video has become a hit online and viewed more than 250,000 times since it was uploaded to YouTube last week.

In the two minute clip the brave worker can be seen grabbing snakes from their sleeping spots and hurling then across the cobra pit so he could clean up their mess, skin and eggs.

And if you can make it to the end of the video, it gets worse, just when you think all of the snakes have been moved the camera pans up to show he's only just beginning.

275x250.jpgArchaeologists believe they may have discovered the world's oldest known homosexual caveman.

Experts say the 5,000-year-old remains were found in a Prague suburb in the Czech Republic, buried a way normally reserved for women.

Because he was buried on his left side and his grave was surrounded by domestic jugs, archaeologists think he would have been homosexual or transsexual.

Corded Ware culture - which began in the late Stone Age - would have seen all men buried lying on their right side with their heads pointing towards the west and surrounded by weapons.

The team who unearthed/outed the gay caveman say that because of the seriousness with which funeral rites were treated it's unlikely his positioning was a mistake.

275x250.jpgPolice in the US say they are investigating after being called out to a man who'd been superglued to a supermarket toilet.

Emergency workers attended the Maryland Walmart after a unfortunate 48-year-old man sat on a loo which had been booby-trapped by pranksters.

Because teams were unable to free the man at the scene they were forced to transport him to a nearby hospital while still attached to the seat.

Doctors were eventually able to prise the unnamed man from the seat though they would not reveal exactly how long it took.

It's not thought the man was targeted in the stunt, but police say the pranksters could face charges of second-degree assault… if they get to the bottom of it.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

A man in New Mexico was a bit late in trying to get help for a woman he took to hospital -- doctors say the body was decomposing and had been dead for a day and a half. (WTNH)

A £5 million stealth super-boat dubbed 'the Batmobile of the sea' (or M80 Stiletto Stealth if you are getting all technical) is being used to hunt down drug runners by the US Dept of Defence. (Metro)

All parents will know how hard it can be to calm down a hyperactive child, well police in the US have a possible solution… they recently used pepper spray on an eight-year-old. (Aol Weird News)

It's every dad's nightmare. Seeing their son grow up to be… a supporter of a rival team. However, we're not sure threatening to evict your child is the best way of dealing with the situation. (SportsGrid)

A woman in Ohio had to call 911 recently after somehow accidentally locking herself into the boot of her car. (WeInterrupt)

We've all been there, you've done something like throw a teabag across the kitchen and towards a mug, only for it to land in the target with almost superhero precision.

Well imagine what it would be like if that sort of thing happened to you all the time. Or alternatively click play... because your day might be something like this.

This is a 'best of' video from the good folks at who set out to film themselves pulling everyday tricks like throwing bread into a toaster or kicking bottles of water onto a table.

While the video lasts just two minutes, we dread to think how many takes were involved and how long it actually took to film… actually we think you can see Thomas and Sebastian age if you look carefully.

This story can safely be filed in the 'headlines which can be answered with the word no' category, but some TV viewers think this news broadcast filmed a ghost.

On Monday evening, Harriet Prest had broadcast a report on ITV London Tonight, detailing a serious road accident which happened on the M11.

And while nothing unusual was noticed at the time, as soon as the show went out, viewers started notice spooky goings-on. Namely an odd shadow in the background.

Chatting online, many viewers speculated that the mystery 'blob' was spiritual energy trying to cross the road and that the footage proved the existence of ghosts.

However, and you knew this was coming, show bosses say the 'ghost' was actually a out-of-focus insect crawling on the lens. It's ALWAYS an insect on the lens.

275x250.jpg Continuing his one-man quest to conquer all environments, Sir Richard Branson has revealed his next target -- the deepest parts of the world's oceans.

Virgin Oceanic will see Branson and fellow adventurers exploring the bottom of the deepest oceans in a specially constructed craft, DeepFlight Challenger, which was designed by Graham Hawkes.

The submersible is built from carbon fibre and has a viewing capsule made from a single piece of quartz which can endure the pressure of 1,000 atmospheres at depth.

Over the next two years the Virgin sub will be used to dive to the deepest parts of each of the world's oceans… and some people said Branson couldn't sink any lower.

A crook had to be rescued by a team of firefighters after climbing into a recycling bin and getting trapped inside for four hours.

Working with a pal the man had been stealing clothes donated to charity in the Bristol clothes recycling skip, by climbing inside and passing clothes back out.

But when, in the early hours of the morning, the thief on the outside realised they'd been seen on CCTV cameras, he scarpered, leaving his (presumably former friend) trapped in the textile bin.

Firefighters and police were then called to the supermarket carpark and it took four hours to coax the man out, eventually by cutting the top open.

It's thought the duo were trying to steal the clothes from the British Red Cross bin in the hope of selling them on rather than looking for a new wardrobe for themselves.

While we don't advise using a video camera while driving, it really didn't make much of a difference in his accident… and it made for some dramatic footage.

Wendy Cobb had been annoyed that two trucks driving ahead of her were holding up traffic in South Carolina, so she picked up a video camera and started filming them.

But she didn't expect what happened next. One of the trucks hit a piece of 2x4 which was sitting on the road, and kicked up up at her car, sending it flying straight at the windscreen.

While the wood dramatically smashed through the glass, Wendy was amazingly not injured in the terrifying accident, which is a stark reminder of the how quickly accidents can happen… and why you need to keep the camera rolling.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

Not long ago we saw what can happen if school bullying is not tackled -- well no-one can accuse this teacher of not tackling it head on. (Times Union) (ebaumsworld)

A 19-year-old convicted murderer who is serving a life sentence has been named 'Miss Jail' after winning a prison beauty pageant in Brazil. (Aol Weird News)

A student who got bored in a government and politics lecture at college, yawned so hard that she dislocated her jaw and had to visit hospital because she couldn't close her mouth. (Asylum)

Maria Hose Cristerna is not your normal mother. The 35-year-old from Mexico has become known as vampire woman after taking her body art to the extreme. Yes those are horns. (Daily Mail)

Marathon runner Noel Bresland has run 26.2 miles in the London Eye as part of his bid to complete 223 marathons in 10 years. (Telegraph)

It's a good job Felice Cohen doesn't suffer from claustrophobia, because she lives in what could well be the smallest apartment in the world.

The tiny 12 feet by 7 feet New York home measures under 90 sq ft and is so small that Cohen has to sit sideways to fit on the loo and sleeps inches from her ceiling.

While there's no kitchen and the writer admits she had to discard many of her belongings before moving in, Cohen says her 'microstudio' is ideal for her her style of living.

She says the cramped conditions are worth it because she gets to live in New York's Upper West Side for just $700 a month while her neighbours pay $3,000… admittedly they don't have a panic attack every time they go to bed.

275x250.jpgA prosthetic leg and a bag of human hair are just some of the odd items which have been donated to a homeless charity, it has been revealed.

Other bizarre donations made to Emmaus, in Gloucestershire, include a birds nest, an urn containing either human or animal ashes, and a (unused) coffin.

Bosses - who decided to compile the list of the top 10 strangest donations - say while they appreciate all donations, they frequently receive ones they are unable to sell.

Recently such charitable gifts also included 10 blown light bulbs, a used diary and a sack of potatoes

And that's before you get to the set of dentures and bag of used and unwashed underwear… which we for some reason hope didn't come from the same person.

We had a pretty good April Fool's Day, not only did our Facebook filter story go down well, but we also managed to avoid being taken in by any pranks ourselves.

Unfortunately the annual day of enforced japery didn't go as well for TV news presenter Shally Zomorodi… she was tricked into licking an iPad on live TV.

The presenter had been on air on KSWB when her co-host Raoul Martinez introduced an item about a new iPhone and iPad app which allows users to smell and taste food on their device.

And then she was encouraged to sniff and lick an iPad which was handed to her, which she did,  prompting a "Happy April Fool's Day" message to flash up… and for her to run off set red-faced.

275x250.jpg For £5,000 you could buy a top of the range 3D television complete with HD, surround sound and built-in apps with internet access… or you could buy this.

Britain's oldest working television set, built in 1936, is expected to sell for around £5,000 when it's auctioned later this month.

The 12 inch Marconi type–702 television was originally bought for £100 on November 26, just three weeks after television transmissions began in London.

But the new owner didn't have much luck, three days after the purchase the Crystal Palace transmitter burned down and they couldn't receive pictures again until 1946.

BMX rider Greg Powell has completed the world's first 'special flip' on his bike… and that's more impressive than it sounds.

It actually means he rode off a ramp and leaped into the air before leaving his saddle completing a mid-air backflip and landed back on the BMX.

Yes, you read that correctly, he did a mid-air backflip before landing back on his bike while it was still flying the 32ft between ramps. Really.

Powell, from Maryland in the US, recently performed the stunt at MTV's Nitro Circus Live tour in Australia where fans went crazy for the impressive trick.

While the 27-year-old made the 'special flip' look remarkably easy, you probably shouldn't try this at home… even if you have got giant twin ramps in your back garden.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

When this German teenager told her parents she wanted a horse so that she could take up show jumping, they said no. But Regina wasn't going to let that stop her, she spent two years training a cow. (BBC)

An Australian woman has had a lucky escape after somehow surviving an accident in which she drove her car off the sixth floor of car park and crashed onto the street below. (The Sun)

The face of Jesus has appeared in a three-cheese pizza. Not a meat feast, not a pepperoni, a three-cheese pizza. (Aol Weird News)

Just three months out of office Arnold Schwarzenegger is set to star in a crime-fighting superhero cartoon called The Governator which is being produced by Stan Lee. (CNet)

Footballers sometimes scores a goal which looks more like a cross which accidentally ended up in the back of the net. And along those lines, we think it's safe to assume this goal was equally unintentional. (Asylum)

275x250.jpg This amazing photo shows the moment when a young boy's ghostly playmate was captured in a photograph taken with a mobile phone, a family have claimed.

Julie Smith, 52, says she was amazed when she first saw the picture, taken by her daughter showing her grandson, five-year-old Sirus, standing next to a childlike, spectral figure.

The photo was taken in the family home in Redhill, Surrey, where it's claimed there have been a series of spooky goings-on including things regularly being moved around.

Julie - who insists the photo is not faked - says she and her daughter Sarah are not too bothered by the ghostly apparition as Sirus always seems to get on well with the spook.

A football goalkeeper who shot to fame after recording a trick shot video of himself earlier this year, is at it again, and this one could be even better.

UNC Asheville keeper Lassi Hurskainen released his first video in February and it showed him kicking with amazing accuracy and making a series of great saves.

In fact many of the 2.5 million people who watched it on YouTube suggested that his accuracy was so good, it must have been digitally manipulated.

So, hoping to prove them wrong Hurskainen has recorded footage of himself performing another equally impressive set of tricks - including kicking a ball into a bucket on the back of a speeding golf-kart.

Other tricks include hitting the crossbar from almost unbelievable distances and making saves over the bonnet of a car… because you'd be surprised how often that comes up in a real match.

275x250.jpg Thousands of pillow-wielding people gathered in cities around the world over the weekend, to take part in a series of pillow fights on International Pillow Fight Day.

Marking the fourth year of the annual good-natured bedding battles - started by the The Urban Playground Movement - pillow fights were arranged in cities from New York and London to Zurich and Taipei.

Each pillow brawl saw 'fighters' arrive with their own pillows before commencing battle at a pre-arranged time and seeing feathers fly.

Many of the participants wore fancy dress or pyjamas for the mass pillow fights and ran around hitting people with pillows until they were worn out… at least they had something comfortable to rest their head on when they got tired.

275x250.jpgA Swedish magazine has been bombarded with hundreds of job applications after advertising a for a 'beach bum' position. And we can't say we are surprised.

Amelia magazine last week launched their search for a "beach tester" who would be charged with spending four weeks touring the world trying out different beaches.

The ad stated: "Included in the job assignment is going on outings, lying on beach chairs, drinking wine in local taverns, and other ordinary assignments found in a commercial beach and tourist environment.

"In certain areas, receiving a full-body massage, testing drinks, snorkelling, and book reading may be required."

Despite many people thinking the stunt was an April Fools joke, the Swedish National Public Employment Service received a fair few applications… including ours.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

In a rare bit of good news coming out of Japan, a dog which is believed to have survived the tsunami and been carried out to sea three weeks ago, has rescued by coastguards. (GuVid) (Telegraph)

A pair of children have been left injured after a strong wind lifted a bouncy castle from the ground and across three lanes of traffic. (Aol Weird News)

Mohammed al Fayed has told Fulham fans they can "go to hell" if they don't like the new Michael Jackson statue which has bizarrely been erected at Craven Cottage. (GuVid) (Yahoo)

A man has used his prosthetic leg to tackle an armed robber who he saw holding up a convenience store in Massachusetts. (Aslyum)

Remember when you used to play football at school, there was always one kid who was far better than anyone else… well we bet even they couldn't compete this nine-year-old who has been dubbed the "Japanese Messi". (GuVid)

275x250.jpg Celebrating the wedding between Prince William and Kate Middleton in their own inimitable style, bosses at Legoland have depicted the happy couple in miniature bricks.

It took a team of model makers at Legoland Windsor over 30 hours to build the tribute to William and Kate's nuptials - depicting them at the palace gates surrounded by crowds and members of the royal family - using 10,000 bricks.

Each of the 10cm tall figures is said to have taken someone almost an hour to make and they include Lego brick versions of guests including, David and Victoria Beckham, Paul McCartney and Elton John.

If you look closely you will also see Lego versions of the Queen, other members of the Royal Family and even a few brick Corgis.

A monster truck driver has become the first person to complete a full backflip in one of the big-wheeled vehicles. And it's more impressive than it sounds.

The stunt by Ryan Anderson has become an online hit since he performed it in Las Vegas during the recent Monster Jam World Finals.

Anderson started off by revving the engine of his giant 12-ton truck and driving over a small ramp to help him build up speed.

From there he drove into another ramp which was angled at a wall and as the momentum carried him upwards the truck flipped.

While we've somehow managed to make that sound simple and as though anyone could do it, we're assured it wasn't and they couldn't.

275x250.jpgA man who can rotate his feet to the point that it looks like his legs are on backwards has seen his elastic abilities earn him a place in the record books.

Moses Lanham (aka Mr Elastic) recently gained world records by rotating his legs further than anyone else and being the fastest man to walk 20 metres with his feet turned backwards.

The 49-year-old from Michigan, says he first discovered his hyper flexibility in a PE class at school when he fell over and because of the position of his legs people assumed he was injured.

But he was fine and simply jumped back up… and then started showing off his new-found flexibility to anyone who would watch. Later going on to do a lot of charity work for Children.

Mr Elastic says he has "total flexability" in his lower limbs, but that his upper body is limited by more normal movement, which is probably a good thing... otherwise he could forget which way he is mean to face.

275x250.jpg Okay so it's that time of year again when you can't believe anything you read on the internet (as opposed to the rest of the time).

And April Fools Day 2011 has brought us more hoaxes and pranks than you can shake an article at -- so rather than try to round them all up, we decided to hunt out the Top 10.

So with very little further ado, here is our selection of the best April Fools' Day jokes 2011 had to offer… and we didn't even include our own.

If you think there are better April Fools Day stories we've missed, please let us know in the comments.

wnwdw.jpgWeird News We Didn't Write: Our daily roundup of the best odd news stories from elsewhere on the web.

When Joanie Ranahan noticed her "engine warning" light was flashing she took her car to mechanics. But she would probably have been just as goo driving to the vets… a family of squirrels were found nesting under the hood. (CBS)

Police in California say they've charged a man who visited a massage parlour, claimed to massage parlour inspector and then demanded a rubdown and $200. (Aol Weird News)

A US convenience store assistant who'd told his boss that if the shop was ever robbed, he would put up a fight, has lived up to his word after wrestling a weapon from a gunman. (9 News)

A drunk OAP who got his groove on to a bit of Led Zeppelin has become an online hit after his inebriated dancing was uploaded to YouTube. (Metro) (YouTube)

An earthquake with a magnitude of 2.2 on the Richter scale shook homes in Blackpool this morning. (Telegraph)

275x250.jpgRecognising the fact that many people are bored by their friends continually talking about certain topics on Facebook, bosses will today introduce a 'baby and wedding filter'.

A recent survey of 10,000 Facebook users found that it was updates about newly born babies and upcoming weddings which most irked users and put them off logging in more.

As a result, engineers set about creating a system which automatically scans all status updates and uses an algorithm to identify the offending ones talking about babies and wedding.

While users previous had the option of blocking a user from appearing in on their page altogether, this option (which will appear in Account Settings) will only block those status updates relating to weddings or babies.

The option is due to go live at midday today. A later update to the baby and wedding filter will see Facebook automatically identify people who upload an image of their child as a profile images and instantly block them for you.

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